So what is forgiveness? Forgiveness happens when you let go of your anger, your negative thoughts as well as resentments towards someone who has done you wrong. When you forgive a person, you willingly decide to move forward and you see that person’s actions in a much broader context, rather than letting the actions define that individual.
Forgiveness is pretty much an internal process that does not require both parties to be involved with. You have to choice to either forgive somebody, or let it be. They don’t have to have the same mutual feeling, and it isn’t a two-way street.
Safety First Always
Sometimes, you might decide not to forgive a person in order to try and avoid meeting that person face-to-face. Meeting them in this manner could be hurtful and it is crucial that you protect yourself first.
Sometimes reconciliation might not be advisable. A good example of this is when someone is involved in some sort of domestic violence and he or she can’t seem to let go of feeling anger as well as vengeance towards the offending partner in the relationship. The only time you would want to forgive that person would be when he decides to make a change for the better and promises were demonstrates that he will no longer repeat the same hurtful actions ever again.
If you have been badly hurt and you’re still really upset about your current situation, get help. You can always find somebody they can help you sort out your feelings and to help you vent your frustrations. A good ear will help you decide whether or not you want to reconcile as well as forgive the person who has hurt you.
Is there something you’ve learned about yourself that you can take from this experience? Always try to learn from your mistakes and better yourself. Do you need to be more careful and not trust others quite so easily perhaps? Or maybe you just need to work on having clear boundaries and rebuilding your self-esteem.
Another way to relieve the tension and to know the way any anxiety as well as anger, is meditation. Meditation also promotes calmness as well as compassion, and there are many good books out there which delves into deeper details regarding this.
Finally, it always helps to find an experienced teacher who offer you support with any hurtful feelings that might crop up on you.